So old, so cold

Happy birthday to my darling husband! On this day twenty-something years ago, your testicles dropped from your heart.

Baby, what a year this has been. I need you to know strong you have been for the both of us, how you've kept us afloat. I can't express in words just how blessed I am to be your wifey.

Things to look forward to in 2010-2011:

1. My employment
2. Your graduation
3. Travel 

We're golden!

Señor Feo

Lately, I've been having so much time on my hands. Yet, it still hasn't prompted me to write more, oh well. I finally finished writing my resume (all one page of it) and am having a few folks proof-read it for me. Next up, cover letter then applying for a job. I have to admit I'm terrified as I've never had a real job before. I mean tutoring is a job, but it hasn't always felt legit or anything.

Today is my mom's birthday! I'm taking the family out to an early dinner at Brio, which has a food happy hour between 4-7pm and the food is sooo good and only $2.95 per plate. We're also combining her birthday with the celebration of Father's Day, which I spent with the in-laws. This will be yet another great opportunity to spend time with my parents before they leave and I'm very much looking forward to it. Next shindig, 4th of July cookout!

Danish has been bombarded with tragic events at work involving the residents at the homeless shelter, and it's taken more of a toll on him than usual. He would try to tell me what it's been like recently, but I can sense how difficult it is for him to relay his emotions as he had experienced them when the events occurred. I feel horrible for the people who are less fortunate than we are - we don't have much, but it's so much compared to them and I am compelled to be utterly thankful to God everyday. This also brings me to acknowledge the hard work Danish puts forth everyday to help others as well as support us. I think I need to try harder to remember that even when it's gets lonely and I feel neglected. I couldn't do his job nor meet the expectations of a man; girls have it easier in life, I think...at least I do compared to others. Most of my problems are a result of my own actions/inactions and originate from my head rather than outside circumstances.

Speaking of heads, I finally got a haircut! It's been 6 months. My new hair dresser isn't as talented as Rachel, but I can't complain too much since it only costed me $25. However, I did do something stupid once I came home. I looked in the mirror and thought my bangs looked uneven, so I CUT it! They weren't uneven. "It'll grow!" my sister consoled. Yes, it'll grow...unevenly.

I know you can speak. So say it, say you love me.

A quick update: I am drinking Southern Comfort and pomegranate juice, boiling chicken because I have no time to thaw it before 'attempting' to cook penne rigate with chicken, and waiting for Danish to come home so we can eat and watch Mystic River on DVD.

I had a productive day, I think, and today was my first official day as a 25-year-old. How does it feel? you ask. Well, I'm still unemployed, in bad need of a haircut, and very much in love with life - so...pretty good, I should say!

---This just in, I'm making quite a mess in the kitchen...there's pasta sauce everywhere!

Rien ne pèse tant que un secret

I've taken Midol and the caffeine in it is making my heart race. In other news, I hope I pass the HESI this Monday. Now for some random pictures:

CPR

I'm still in bed, the apartment is all toasty, and Danish is coming home from work! I'm so spoiled. Today is my brother's 19th birthday and we're going to shop for some winter clothes before he goes back to Austin. Then spending some quality time with Danish as today is also our 5-year anniversary. I wonder if married people still celebrate how long they have been together along with their wedding anniversary. I guess later on it gets to a point where there are too many dates to remember so you just end up celebrating the wedding date. Well, we have two!

And now for some random thoughts and a few of the wedding pictures I actually liked: I need to learn how to cook! I love the antique-looking clock on the wall. God works in mysterious ways. It's cold out apparently. I miss Tank.

Christine

I met Danish's cousin Christine on Wednesday. Blah, that was so long ago...it's strange to meet someone that belongs to the same family who is so normal. Not that there is anything wrong with Danish, or anything wrong with normal; it's just that I've known him for such a long time that I correlate him with my weirdness...he has always been a freak just like me. But Christine...she's so well-adjusted and sweet and all-American. She doesn't look anything like Danish, and she smells so good. And I liked her immediately, to my relief, and I think she liked me back. We picked her up from Danish's other cousin Leah's apartment and went to Billiard Bar on Greenville Avenue for Michelle's 30th birthday. The scene there is nice, where the girls are pierced and tattooed and the guys look like Harmony Korine. It was $1 PBR night! I enjoyed myself and was pleased to see Danish enthusiastically interact with Christine who was equally entertained by everything he said. When midnight rolled around, we embarrassed Michelle by singing happy birthday to her. A few of her friends had shown up, but Michelle excused herself and went home before 1, claiming she was just too tired and old to stay out any longer. She didn't even finish the Tuaca Lemon Drop shot I got for her! At any rate, we made new friends with people we didn't know and laughed and took pictures and bade them farewell as we stumbled back to the car (I stumbled. I was also made fun of by some girls standing in front of The Cavern for saying out loud how much I liked The Cavern). 'Twas a good night, meeting family and celebrating a birthday and all.

I love the rain we've been getting although it prevented us from seeing Grimy Styles after Brad's reception dinner last night. It was all the way out in Red Oak, Texas and we thought we were late. Hank called and said they were just getting out of the church and asked what Danish was wearing. Of course not being part of the wedding party, and having been told it was going to be a BBQ/swimming reception dealio, he was just wearing a T-shirt and shorts (as was I). Hank said, "Oh really? Well, we had to dress nice for this...Brad is wearing his suit and tie...we were going to take pictures, but I guess it will be alright with what you're wearing...hold on, Brad wants to talk to you." (Brad gets on the phone) "Hey, Danny! How's it going, man? What are you wearing? Oh...well, see we're trying to take pictures. I guess we can all change when we get there...oh no, don't worry about it...I guess it's alright." At this, Danish felt like a jackass for not wearing the appropriate attire. Maybe he wanted to cry, haha jk. Then Hank, Brad, and Richard roll up in front of the house and park. Danish tells me, "I bet you anything they were just pranking me." Sure enough, they get out of the car and they were all just wearing T-shirts and shorts, not to mention huge grins on their faces! I thought it was hilarious. I can't believe it's been almost 6 years of Danish and his friends pranking each other.

The rest of the night was fun and relaxing, lots of food and talking. It was pretty to see the lightning outside. I was happy for Brad and Bethany, like a genuine happy. I had that feeling again when I realized my friends were growing up, and I expected it to ache each time, but it didn't. I really felt happy with the fact that everyone was growing up. I can't imagine why I expected it to ache. I guess I'm blessed because it didn't, because I don't have any regrets. The future can be welcomed with open arms and an open heart. That's why I can be genuinely happy for my friends and particularly for myself. It was/is a pleasant feeling :)