Run, run, run away
Lost, lost, lost my mind
Want you to stay
Want you to be my prize
January 31, 2012
Danish, you are God's masterpiece
Once you were dead because of your disobedience and your many sins. You used to live in sin, just like the rest of the world, obeying the devil—the commander of the powers in the unseen world. He is the spirit at work in the hearts of those who refuse to obey God. All of us used to live that way, following the passionate desires and inclinations of our sinful nature. By our very nature we were subject to God’s anger, just like everyone else.
But God is so rich in mercy, and he loved us so much, that even though we were dead because of our sins, he gave us life when he raised Christ from the dead. (It is only by God’s grace that you have been saved!) For he raised us from the dead along with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms because we are united with Christ Jesus. So God can point to us in all future ages as examples of the incredible wealth of his grace and kindness toward us, as shown in all he has done for us who are united with Christ Jesus.
God saved you by his grace when you believed. And you can’t take credit for this; it is a gift from God. Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it. For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago. (Ephesians 2:1-10 NLT)
But God is so rich in mercy, and he loved us so much, that even though we were dead because of our sins, he gave us life when he raised Christ from the dead. (It is only by God’s grace that you have been saved!) For he raised us from the dead along with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms because we are united with Christ Jesus. So God can point to us in all future ages as examples of the incredible wealth of his grace and kindness toward us, as shown in all he has done for us who are united with Christ Jesus.
God saved you by his grace when you believed. And you can’t take credit for this; it is a gift from God. Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it. For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago. (Ephesians 2:1-10 NLT)
January 30, 2012
Dear Danish
It has been a strange and awkward past few days...I am honest when I say I am thrilled at your homecoming, but I am more terrified than anything. I am terrified for your fragile pendulum of a heart, a construction of crushing defeat and love and beauty. I throw my arms out to catch it as it swings toward me yet I can't seem to reach until it swings away again and I can no longer see it. I stare into space hoping I would be able to catch it this next time around when it swings my way, so I wait and I wait.
When you open up to me about your wounds, I learn more about myself and how horrible I was. It's cathartic. It compels me to salvage whatever is left of you and I; it compels me to cherish and love in hopes to nurse those deep wounds and to resuscitate this marriage/relationship/friendship.
I am just a person. I have no special healing powers, I have no soothing touch. All I have is a beat up heart with a constant flow of insane passion pouring out the holes. Your homecoming has incited a new rush. Your love sustains my passions so that it doesn't dry out. I can only hope I can do the same for you.
When you open up to me about your wounds, I learn more about myself and how horrible I was. It's cathartic. It compels me to salvage whatever is left of you and I; it compels me to cherish and love in hopes to nurse those deep wounds and to resuscitate this marriage/relationship/friendship.
I am just a person. I have no special healing powers, I have no soothing touch. All I have is a beat up heart with a constant flow of insane passion pouring out the holes. Your homecoming has incited a new rush. Your love sustains my passions so that it doesn't dry out. I can only hope I can do the same for you.
January 29, 2012
January 26, 2012
You
“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.”
- C. S. Lewis
- C. S. Lewis
January 25, 2012
Lacey granny panties
I hope I can make this right again. I hope I can rise above the pain. I hope I don't burn out. Stumble. Fade.
January 23, 2012
After tonight, I am convinced he is not replaceable. Although I would be okay if he left me, I could never find another to take his place. There is no one like him...I could search heaven and earth and not find a person like him. I must cherish him as though my life depended on it. I dare not lose him again.
I am replaceable. He does not have to look far. I'm common and everyday. Just a girl. If he wanted, he could find someone like me or better.
I question how we can get through this with both our self esteems virtually zero...surely we could not hold one another up when we are weak with defeat and riddled with welts of past wrong doings.
The Lord is our strength, and I'm willing to make the extra effort even as I hurt. I have to believe that for now the worst part is over and we are striving for joyous reconciliation.
I am replaceable. He does not have to look far. I'm common and everyday. Just a girl. If he wanted, he could find someone like me or better.
I question how we can get through this with both our self esteems virtually zero...surely we could not hold one another up when we are weak with defeat and riddled with welts of past wrong doings.
The Lord is our strength, and I'm willing to make the extra effort even as I hurt. I have to believe that for now the worst part is over and we are striving for joyous reconciliation.
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